25 Things about A-Prov...
1. When I was four years old, my Mom and my aunt took me and my cousin to the food court at the mall for lunch. While at the table, I sneezed, and out shot a hard little green pellet from my nose. Apparently, I had stuffed a pea up my nose the week before, to save for a healthy afternoon snack.
2. When I was three, I got an M&M stuck in my belly button.
3. When I was five, I pooped a nickel on the 4th of July, and then cried when Mom wouldn't fish it out of the gas station toilet for me. I still remember seeing it...looking back at me through the watery abyss.
4. When I was in the sixth grade, the teacher made me sit out a Dodgeball game because she said I was throwing too hard. I'm still bitter.
5. I wore sweatpants nearly everyday from the age of 6 all the way up through middle school. Style was of no importance to me because I had to be able to move around freely, so I would be at my optimum dodgeball playing ability each day. The only reason why I think I still had any friends despite the wearing of the sweatpants, was mainly the fact that no one wanted be on 'Sweatpants Adam's Dodgeball Destroy list.'
6. As a young Adam, I twice electrocuted myself by trying to climb an electric fence used to keep our neighbor's horses in the pasture... (in a span of less than two minutes) Sadly, over the next few years I continued to try and climb up the electric fence until our neighbors finally turned it off, mainly because the horses didn't want to get out anyway, and because the neighbor kid wasn't too bright.
7. As an older Adam, on my mission in Argentina, I was electrocuted four times. Occasion #1 - While plugging in a running box fan while barefoot on a wet floor. Occasion # 2- By an electric current that somehow ran through our kitchen faucet. (we never were able to fully understand how that happened.) Occasions #3 and #4 occurred while changing light bulbs, both times I was knocked completely unconscious, however, #4 was by far the worst due to the fact that I had just recently gotten out of the shower and was standing on a metal folding chair.
8. On my birthday, I've twice had birthday dinners consisting of cow stomach and cow brains. For the record, NOT good birthday dinners. Also, during one of my best friend's birthday party/sleepover, I fell asleep with a cupcake in my hand, and somehow it wound up stuck in my buddy's ear when we woke up in the morning.
9. When I was in the Mission Training Center, I accidentally smacked myself in the face while laying in bed. Finding that my arm had fallen completely asleep, I lifted my asleep arm high over my head with my other hand, wanting to know if I could stop my asleep arm from hitting me in the face. Bad idea. Very bad idea. For the record, you can't.
10. I love dogs and cats, but dogs are my favorite, and with my job, I come across dozens of dogs every day, and I've recently considered myself an amateur dog whisperer. I am determined that every dog I come across will like me, even though I've been bitten eight times. I will name my first dog Rosco, after Sheriff Rosco P. Coletrane from the Dukes of Hazzard.
11. Among my sports highlights, I've made the last second shot to win the game, the game saving diving catch, got the winning hit, and weaved into the end zone for the winning touchdown. However, I've struck out with the bases loaded to end the game, I've guarded the guy that torched me for 40 points to single-handedly beat my team, and I've gone for the interception, only to miss and then see my guy run 80 yards for the touchdown. Gotta take the good with the bad.
12. While I consider myself athletic and coordinated, I am unable to walk up or down stairs without intently looking at the the stairs, or else I will always trip, guaranteed. I've tried to overcome this several times, and can only go about four steps without looking at them before I take a header.
13. During my life, I've had several nicknames. Pre-mission nicknames included, Prov, Herb, Snowplow, Diesel, Stretch, and Herb Diesel. Post-mission nicknames include, A-Prov, Maverick, Mr. Miyagi, Old Man River, and Space Cowboy.
14. When I was 8 years old and about to get baptized, some of the older boys in my ward informed me that there were invisible sharks and alligators in the baptismal font and that they'd eat me. They told me that they hadn't eaten for a while and were very hungry. Tragedy was averted when my Dad told all the invisible sharks and alligators to get out of the font cause Adam was going to get baptized that day.
15. I love the smell of bacon, freshly cut grass, and the smell of a leather baseball glove. So, if you ever see me on a freshly mowed baseball field, smelling my baseball glove, and eating bacon, then you'll know to just leave Adam alone, he's in his Happy Place.
16. In kickball, I kicked the a longest homerun in 3rd grade history, according to 3rd grade Adam's journal entry, which was later verified through exhaustive research of the "History of 3rd Grade Kickball Statistical Almanac," First Edition, written by 3rd grade Adam.
17. I was so serious about becoming a professional kickball player, that I used to ride my bike back to the kickball field after school, and practice running the bases for hours by myself. On one occasion, I learned a valuable lesson. Never run around the bases with your mouth open. While running the bases, I sucked in a wasp, and it stung me in the back of the throat. Mr. Wasp may have won that battle, but I won the war... cause down the hatch he went.
18. I've read over 40 books on the Vietnam War and over 20 books on the Attack on Pearl Harbor and the World War II battles in the Pacific. I'm now thinking of starting to read books on the Korean War.
19. I love thunderstorms, especially the ones at night with the lightning that would light up your room for in instant followed closely by ear-splitting thunder.
20. My favorite TV shows as a child were, CHiPs, TJ Hooker, The A-Team, Knight Rider, Dukes of Hazzard, and Scooby Doo. My favorite TV shows now are, Arrested Development, The Office, Man Vs. Wild, and ESPN Sportscenter.
21. My first car was a 1979 Dodge Colt, no A/C, no tape player, no power steering and only one outside mirror, located on the driver's side. Apparently, the car didn't go fast enough to ever merit being in the left lane, hence no need for a passenger mirror.
22. I LOVE to go mountain climbing. In the last year alone, I've hiked to the summit of over 40 mountains.
23. I will one day own a fully restored 1955-1957 Chevy Bel Air, and a 1937-1939 Ford coupe.
24. My first kiss came when I was nearly 22. That was when I found out that girls really DON'T have cooties.
25. I love my family. Period. They are the greatest people in my life.
2. When I was three, I got an M&M stuck in my belly button.
3. When I was five, I pooped a nickel on the 4th of July, and then cried when Mom wouldn't fish it out of the gas station toilet for me. I still remember seeing it...looking back at me through the watery abyss.
4. When I was in the sixth grade, the teacher made me sit out a Dodgeball game because she said I was throwing too hard. I'm still bitter.
5. I wore sweatpants nearly everyday from the age of 6 all the way up through middle school. Style was of no importance to me because I had to be able to move around freely, so I would be at my optimum dodgeball playing ability each day. The only reason why I think I still had any friends despite the wearing of the sweatpants, was mainly the fact that no one wanted be on 'Sweatpants Adam's Dodgeball Destroy list.'
6. As a young Adam, I twice electrocuted myself by trying to climb an electric fence used to keep our neighbor's horses in the pasture... (in a span of less than two minutes) Sadly, over the next few years I continued to try and climb up the electric fence until our neighbors finally turned it off, mainly because the horses didn't want to get out anyway, and because the neighbor kid wasn't too bright.
7. As an older Adam, on my mission in Argentina, I was electrocuted four times. Occasion #1 - While plugging in a running box fan while barefoot on a wet floor. Occasion # 2- By an electric current that somehow ran through our kitchen faucet. (we never were able to fully understand how that happened.) Occasions #3 and #4 occurred while changing light bulbs, both times I was knocked completely unconscious, however, #4 was by far the worst due to the fact that I had just recently gotten out of the shower and was standing on a metal folding chair.
8. On my birthday, I've twice had birthday dinners consisting of cow stomach and cow brains. For the record, NOT good birthday dinners. Also, during one of my best friend's birthday party/sleepover, I fell asleep with a cupcake in my hand, and somehow it wound up stuck in my buddy's ear when we woke up in the morning.
9. When I was in the Mission Training Center, I accidentally smacked myself in the face while laying in bed. Finding that my arm had fallen completely asleep, I lifted my asleep arm high over my head with my other hand, wanting to know if I could stop my asleep arm from hitting me in the face. Bad idea. Very bad idea. For the record, you can't.
10. I love dogs and cats, but dogs are my favorite, and with my job, I come across dozens of dogs every day, and I've recently considered myself an amateur dog whisperer. I am determined that every dog I come across will like me, even though I've been bitten eight times. I will name my first dog Rosco, after Sheriff Rosco P. Coletrane from the Dukes of Hazzard.
11. Among my sports highlights, I've made the last second shot to win the game, the game saving diving catch, got the winning hit, and weaved into the end zone for the winning touchdown. However, I've struck out with the bases loaded to end the game, I've guarded the guy that torched me for 40 points to single-handedly beat my team, and I've gone for the interception, only to miss and then see my guy run 80 yards for the touchdown. Gotta take the good with the bad.
12. While I consider myself athletic and coordinated, I am unable to walk up or down stairs without intently looking at the the stairs, or else I will always trip, guaranteed. I've tried to overcome this several times, and can only go about four steps without looking at them before I take a header.
13. During my life, I've had several nicknames. Pre-mission nicknames included, Prov, Herb, Snowplow, Diesel, Stretch, and Herb Diesel. Post-mission nicknames include, A-Prov, Maverick, Mr. Miyagi, Old Man River, and Space Cowboy.
14. When I was 8 years old and about to get baptized, some of the older boys in my ward informed me that there were invisible sharks and alligators in the baptismal font and that they'd eat me. They told me that they hadn't eaten for a while and were very hungry. Tragedy was averted when my Dad told all the invisible sharks and alligators to get out of the font cause Adam was going to get baptized that day.
15. I love the smell of bacon, freshly cut grass, and the smell of a leather baseball glove. So, if you ever see me on a freshly mowed baseball field, smelling my baseball glove, and eating bacon, then you'll know to just leave Adam alone, he's in his Happy Place.
16. In kickball, I kicked the a longest homerun in 3rd grade history, according to 3rd grade Adam's journal entry, which was later verified through exhaustive research of the "History of 3rd Grade Kickball Statistical Almanac," First Edition, written by 3rd grade Adam.
17. I was so serious about becoming a professional kickball player, that I used to ride my bike back to the kickball field after school, and practice running the bases for hours by myself. On one occasion, I learned a valuable lesson. Never run around the bases with your mouth open. While running the bases, I sucked in a wasp, and it stung me in the back of the throat. Mr. Wasp may have won that battle, but I won the war... cause down the hatch he went.
18. I've read over 40 books on the Vietnam War and over 20 books on the Attack on Pearl Harbor and the World War II battles in the Pacific. I'm now thinking of starting to read books on the Korean War.
19. I love thunderstorms, especially the ones at night with the lightning that would light up your room for in instant followed closely by ear-splitting thunder.
20. My favorite TV shows as a child were, CHiPs, TJ Hooker, The A-Team, Knight Rider, Dukes of Hazzard, and Scooby Doo. My favorite TV shows now are, Arrested Development, The Office, Man Vs. Wild, and ESPN Sportscenter.
21. My first car was a 1979 Dodge Colt, no A/C, no tape player, no power steering and only one outside mirror, located on the driver's side. Apparently, the car didn't go fast enough to ever merit being in the left lane, hence no need for a passenger mirror.
22. I LOVE to go mountain climbing. In the last year alone, I've hiked to the summit of over 40 mountains.
23. I will one day own a fully restored 1955-1957 Chevy Bel Air, and a 1937-1939 Ford coupe.
24. My first kiss came when I was nearly 22. That was when I found out that girls really DON'T have cooties.
25. I love my family. Period. They are the greatest people in my life.
Some things NEVER change.
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